Sunday, February 24, 2008

Oscar wear

Today's the most important day of the calendar year, and you need a t-shirt to celebrate it appropriately.

I Drink Your Milkshake shirt, $18.99. The product description:
"Here at 24/7 Magnum, we're a family business. Our shirts are designed by my illegitimate son—and partner—H.W. Magnum, and education of the young is our primary concern, immediately after draining any untapped oil reserves. And we promise you that if you have a milkshake, and we have a milkshake, we will NOT run a straw from our milkshake to your milkshake, thereby drinking your milkshake as well. Because milkshake theft is not what families are all about. "

Friend-o tshirt, $18.99. From the description: "It's an affordable way to separate friendo from moocho, and goes with any haircut."

This Atonement box is pretty awful and tacky, but I guess there isn't a huge demand for Atonement wear right now. It's $28 and looks like something your little sister might make.

Also, if you have $10,000 dollars lying around, you can bid on a charity auction for the sublime green dress Kiera Knightley wore in that movie.

For all my homeskillets, you can buy the Dancing Elk Condors t-shirt, $25.65, worn by Michael Cera on the poster and as part of his track uniform.

Another Juno option is a working Hamburger phone, $15.99, to schedule all your abortions on. Finally, if you want to really show your love for Juno, there's the Empathy Belly! Not only will it give you a fun new shape to stretch your t-shirts over, but it also simulates over 20 symptoms of pregnancy: fetal kicking, weight gain, bladder pressure, backaches, fatigue and irritability!

Finding swag for Michael Clayton is kind of tough... you could be a total creeper and buy a sketchbook with a photo of kiddie Cloons' and his sister on the front for $6.50.

Or you could remember that freezing February day two years ago when I was wandering around Tribeca and saw George Clooney filming this movie, and as he walked to his trailer he looked at me and said, "Woo, it's cold!" And it was so cold and he was so hot that I couldn't do anything but giggle like an idiot. Next time I go Clooney stalking I'll wear one of those crazy warm North Face coats, like the Nuptse Jacket, $199.

Some self-pimping: you can find my Oscar Predictions here. Everyone enjoy the show and I'll be back tomorrow to discuss what monstrosity Cate Blanchett wore!

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