Gifts for dudes who did you a favor, or boyfriends

As a perpetual singleton, I happily enjoy the lack of stress over Valentine's Day. I don't need to drop hints about jewelry, I don't have to leave reminders about dinner reservations, I don't have to buy a new outfit, I don't have to get anything waxed, and I don't have to buy some confusing guy a gift. But maybe some of you do! And I know that my lovely and gracious friend Ali owes some dude a thank you gift, so this post is doing double duty. All I know about the person Ali is beholden to is that he's 23 or 24, he likes to travel, and he's a douche. Her words, not mine.

My first idea for Ali's friend, or your gentleman caller, would be a sweet Puma messenger bag, or maybe a weekend bag. This shoulder bag, $60, is in bold but guy-friendly colors, with a classic shape and style. Or, if he works out a lot and is always leaving gross gym clothes on the floor, get him this black and silver medium bag, $21. It has a bigass silver Puma on it!


I don't want to make gross generalizations, but all 24 year old douches love to drink, and all boys love gadgets. So check out the Bar Gadget Kit from Crate and Barrel, $29.95. The disc thing has recipes for classic cocktails, there's a corkscrew, foil cutter, wine stopper, and some other things that I don't know what they do. What the hell is a jigger? Let him figure it out!

This one is not a Valentine's Day gift, but it is a classic thank you gift: baskets of food! I'm a huge fan of Hickory Farms-- for Christmas, I got a box with the beef summer sausage and smoked cheddar cheese, and I was in heaven. I wish I had jumped when they had all their gift sets on sale in January. But this Cheese Ball Combo Gift Box is a good deal at $17.50, and comes with a nice assortment of yummy foods. Also, who doesn't love popcorn tins? My family used to get one of those three-kind tins (caramel, cheese and butter!) every Christmas, but we must have had some sort of falling out with whoever gave it because my life has been Popcorn Facotry free for the last few years. I'm tempted to buy this tin myself-- it's $9.99, because the tin commerates some NHL game between the Red Wings and Blackhawks that took place on January 1st. Does this mean that this popcorn is a month old?

Or you could go with the Mindy Kaling approved option, Snookies! By the way, I totally just went through all 30 entries tagged "Food" on Things I've Bought That I Love-- what a chore. Just kidding, of course! I sort of want to sit down and reread the entire archives, like a book. An internet book on things to buy and love. Anyway, back to Snookies, which Mindy claims are the best cookies ever. You can send someone a box of 18 cookies with 1/2 gallon of milk (on ice!) for $31.45.

I've brought up boy moccasins before, but I'm telling you: they're a thing. Target has some cheap ones with a suede upper and fleece lining, for $16.99.


I always think Moleskine notebooks make good gifts, especially the city guides. Part guidebook, part notebook, but with the classic, quality Moleskine cover and paper. This gift is especially good for guys who think all of their thoughts are really deep, and should be preserved for future generations. The Washington, DC book is $16.95.

Big, glossy coffee table books are great gifts, except for people who move frequently (nobody likes packing or shipping coffee table books). I have The Travel Book, by Lonely Planet, $31.50, and it's awesome. There's a two-page spread on every single country in the world: a big, beautiful photo, plus a sidebar with fun and useful facts. It'll make you want to roam the world.

Men's Wallets

I got a request to do a post on men's wallets, and since all of my guy friends are too lazy to shop for themselves (and I'm looking for any reason not to study for midterms) here are a few options:

Really, guys don't have to try too hard with wallets. It's more about what's inside the wallet, if you know what I'm saying. My only stipulation is that it should be leather, or some leather-like material, and have lots of little pockets to hide condoms in.

If you're not a trust fund baby, you can still impress the ladies if you go for a wallet with a label's signature print that'll be recognizable to girls who read Lucky. I like this Coach one because it's subtle enough that other dudes won't think you're lame and you probably (but not definitely) won't get thrown through the window of a dive bar when you whip it out. The Coach Heritage Stripe Double Billfold is $148.

Slightly but not terribly amusing side story: when I met my best friend's boyfriend the three of us went to lunch, and I noticed that his wallet had the Louis Vuitton logo on the outside of it. After he left, I said to her, "This is a weird question, but is your boyfriend really rich?" Apparently the LV wallet was a fake, and also maybe someone gave it to him, but I really liked the idea that he's been using it with no idea what the LV print is kind of a thing.

Going a little cheaper is this Cole Haan croc embossed wallet, $51 (on sale from $85 on Bluefly!). The worn-in leather, the metal stud-- this is a badass wallet. I like the flip-out ID flap, too.





Is it me or do most men's wallets not have coin purses? I guess men always have pockets to put their change in. But this Flyby International Traveler wallet, $45, from Fossil has one. They called it a "snap coin holder," and I'm imaging the giant brainstorming session that went on to come up with an alternate phrase for the femme-y "coin purse." Also, the marbleized texture of the leather is pretty cool.



Speaking of cool, this wallet from Urban Outfitters is called the Fonz Wallet, $22. From the outside it looks like a totally boring wallet, but then you pop it open and see those sweet criss-cross card holders and the check billfold lining. That Fonz always did have a surprise in his back pocket. This wallet also comes in black, but the lining in that one has a lot more pink and kind of looks like the tablecloth your grandma will put on the kid's table at your big family Easter dinner.

UO has another wallet that I want to include just because of the name. This is the Obey Dirty Work wallet, $35, so it should be perfect for that guy you know who always has dead hookers in the back of his car. But it seems like, with the fake vintage logo and the paint splatters and the freaking guitar pick holders inside, this wallet is just trying way too hard. Just like Norm MacDonald! This is one of those things that might be ok to use if you found it in a trunk of your dad's old stuff from his hippie days and it still smelled like clove cigarettes, but when you buy it from Urban Outfitters it's not acceptable.

Finally, if I were a guy, I would just forgo a wallet altogether and use a badass money clip. Preferably from Tiffany, with something engraved on it like "The OG," and it'll be a gift from the Mob elders when I finally get "made" (I obviously watched Goodfellas last week, and it helped temper my dislike of all things Scorsese. But I felt it didn't do a good enough job of describing how someone becomes "made." I figured out from context clues that it isn't getting shot in the back of the head in someone's rec room, to sounds of the guitar solo in Layla. Is it a ceremony, like a baptism or the ritual Wormtail performed to bring Voldemort back? Or do they just sit you down, shake your hand, give you a money clip, and say, "Congratulations, now you're made." It's really bothering me that I don't know this). Then I'll pay for everything in cash, hand out $100 tips to the car park guy, and do a lot of snorting of certain substances. The classic silver money clip from Tiffany is $95, which will be chump change when I become part of the Mob.

This one's for the boys

It should be obvious that the intended audience for this blog is males 18 to 25 years of age who like video games and drinking beer. The whole reason we started blogging is to help bring espadrilles and lockets to dudes all over America, and I think that, so far, it's all been an unqualified success. Every day when I'm walking down the street I get stopped by college guys who say, "Thank you for that post on wrap dresses. It saved my life." At this point I've heard it so often that I'm like, "Yeah, whatever, I know." But that doesn't mean I'm going to stop bringing pretty, dainty jewelry to our male readers, so don't despair!

Today's topic is coats and jackets. First off, don't just throw on a North Face fleece and think you're done. I don't care if they're warm and comfortable, because they are the laziest pieces of outerwear ever created. They're the Uggs of outerwear. You can do better than that.

Every guy needs a good peacoat, and it's even better if it's in navy blue or dark green instead of black. This one, from the Gap, is waxed cotton-- I like the winter-y style in the spring-y fabric. This is the jacket you should wear when the weather is in the 50's and you'd normally be wearing a hoodie but recently decided not to be a slub. Also, check out the lighter-blue striped shirt underneath, with the color poking out. That's good styling. The Waxed-Cotton peacoat is $88.

When I first started this post I looked at the Sartorialist for inspiration, to try and figure how men's fashion can ever be not boring. This is one of the first photos that caught my eye, and you should go see it full-size so you can check out the greenish-grey sweater poking out underneath, and the single pin on his chest.

That jacket is similar to the Military jacket, $88, also from the Gap. I think all guys will agree that it's good to have a jacket with lots of pockets so you never run out of places to put condoms. It only comes in "ginseng brown," though.

As I'm searching for more jackets, I'm having a hard time deciding whether I actually like that piece of clothing or I just think the model's cute. Like, how cute is this guy and how boring is his jacket? He looks like a model-y version of the guy in the T-Mobile commercial who keeps leaving messages for the girl he went on a date with last night, like "Hey, sorry I was sweating so much last night, it's a gland thing..." I love that guy! But I hope he would have more sense than to buy a $68 hoodie from Banana Republic in a color called "groundhog heather" (what a bunch of queerballs).

You guys, I've been working on this post all morning and I'm about to fall asleep from boredom. Men's fashion fucking blows. But I'm going to take some caffeine pills and keep going, all for Ariel.

This is a pretty nice coat, I guess. From Toscano, it's called the "Walking Coat," $298, so there's no running or jumping allowed. It's mostly wool (warm) with a hint of cashmere (soft).

I love jackets with toggles, even though I understand they can be kind of a pain to fasten and unfasten. But they have a very "tailgating at the big game" feel, which appeals to fun college girls. It's by Marc New York and it's $159 at Bluefly.

I can't say for sure, but I think I'd be really into a crisp white coat on a guy. It could be a little overly foppish, but it could also signal the kind of confidence that comes with high dry-cleaning bills. Especially if the coat was Burberry. This peacoat is $650, but once people catch a glimpse of the Burberry plaid under the collar, it'll be so worth it.

Men's jackets can be so boring, but then you find something with a really fun, surprising detail and everything is good again. The Manolo for the Men blog did a post on this Paul Smith jacket whose lining is a map of London. I couldn't find it anywhere online, but that's the sort of thing you should be on the look-out for if you want a distinctive coat.

I think that's enough men's fashion for today. I'll leave you off with some more coat inspiration, from the Sartorialist and elsewhere:

This kid is totally the douche in your film class who won't shut up about auteur theory and you hate but are secretly attracted to. You'll see him smoking outside of Cantor and hate his sunglasses and skinny jeans, but if he asked you to go see an unknown band in Williamsburg you would probably say yes.


Did you see on the Oscars Red Carpet when Ryan Seacrest told George Clooney, "People used to want to be Cary Grant, but now everyone wants to be you." And Clooney smoothly said, "Well, that's because he's dead and no one wants to be dead." WHY IS HE WASTING HIS LIFE WITH A WOMAN WHO ATE A SCORPION ON NATIONAL TELEVISION?