Crewmutts

Are you maybe having sort of a downer kind of day? You know, it's Monday, it's raining, you're going to die a miserable failure all alone? I have just the cure.
Puppies you guys!! Sometimes when I'm bummed out I like to go hypothetically shopping for my hypothetical future life, which varies in shape and form depending on the day. Today I'm thinking, Young Adult Fiction editor living with my boyfriend John Krasinski on the Upper West Side with a rooftop garden and a cocker spaniel named Pemberley. And that cocker spaniel can't just go around naked (no, seriously! I know clothes for dogs seem totally lame and pointless, but it gets freaking cold in New York and if you have a little dog it'll suffer). And when J.Kras and I take it for walks in Central Park every morning it has to look stylish in case we run into Kevin Kline and Phoebe Cates walking their puggle, Puck. Enter Crewmutts, J.Crew's mini-line of dog clothing and accessories, all exorbitantly priced and completely adorable. The anchor sweater, $55, above, is maybe the cutest thing I've ever seen in my entire life, and my hamster has babies once.

This Ivy Critter sweater, $60, isn't as cute, but I'm totally tickled by the fact that it's dry clean only. You would have to be out of your mind to buy a dry clean only sweater for your dog, and I like that. It looks a little less comfortable than the first sweater, but that's maybe because the dog looks kind of sad, like it has an awful stage mom who spends every second of her weekend trying to get her puppy into modeling shoots. But the little dog bones embroidered all over are pretty darn cute.
Aw, sleeping puppies! I've always wanted to buy a doggie bed, probably because my dog growing up was terrified of the one we bought for her and would never use it. I'm hoping my hypothetical future dog will be made of stronger stuff and will appreciate this madras dog bed, because if she doesn't that'll be a huge waste of $200.

Reinventing the basic black heel

You might that have noticed that, in shoes, my tastes tend to run towards the whimsical, the detailed, the slightly out of the ordinary. Life's too short to wear boring shoes, right? But then being too stubborn to invest in a good pair of black pumps leaves you forced to wear brown heelss with a black dress, since your one pair of black heels are way too open-toed to wear with tights, and it's too cold to go bare legged. I love my Claire Satin Slide Heels, $16.99, from Target, but I can't get away with having them as my only black shoe. (I do have a lot of love for these shoes, since they were my first pair of real heels and I learned how to walk in them. I wore them to cotillion, to English AP cocktail party, to multiple weddings. I bought them almost four years ago but they're so classic that Target still sells them, both in stores and online.)

So after last nights brown shoes/black dress fiasco (not really-- no one noticed), I decided I needed to get a pair of hot black heels. Here's what I'm looking for: preferably close-toed and heeled so I can wear tights, simple enough to match almost anything, but with some element that will make other girls look down and say, "those shoes are totally fucking fierce!" I'm thinking mary jane, t-strap, just something beyond a basic pump.

These are pretty much exactly what I'm looking for, but I can't buy them because they don't have my size and Danielle owns them, and knowingly buying the same pair of shoes as your roommate is just, like, against the rules of feminism. And they also have a little peeptoe, but they call it a "keyhole" so I think it's small enough to get away with tights. The Report Signature "Dita" Mary Jane Pumps, $149.25, are maybe the hottest shoes I've ever seen in my life. If you wear these shoes people will think you're either a really freaky librarian or a really classy burlesque dancer, both of which I want to be (or, at least, want people to think I am).

These shoes aren't quite as hot, and way too expensive, but I find t-straps are way too rare in the shoe world. How is it fair that there are Uggs and Crocs everywhere, but you have to search high and low for a good t-strap pump? The black patent Engage heels by Charles David, $250, also come in a burgundy color that I like so much better. See, that's the problem with shopping for back shoes: if they come in another color, I always want the cobalt or aubergine or jade version.

These Chinese Laundry Attitude shoes, $70, don't have much of a wow factor, but the cut-out on the side is interesting and they'll match every single thing in your closet. I'm also a big fan of the 1/2 inch hidden platform, since you can pretend you're just naturally that tall. Oh, but they come in dark teal! I want the dark teal! It'll match absolutely nothing but I want the dark teal!

Oh, these Report Bijou shoes, $152.10, are so vampy I'm getting a little flushed just looking at the photo online. I like pretty much anything with corset-style tie-up detailing: shirts, underwear, dresses, pants, whatever. These shoes would also be good if you're into toe cleavage, which I'm not really. I don't have anything against toe cleavage, but I sort of don't think it's a real thing we need to talk about and want to create. It's just your toes getting smushed together-- to compare those to real cleavage is just sort of insulting to boobs.

Here's another from the Report label, which I've kind of fallen in love with in the course of writing this post. They're out of my price range, but if I got a job and saved part of a few paychecks I could swing it; contrast that to, say, Manolo Blahniks which I could only afford if I saved ten paychecks and did buy any food for a month. For just $152.10 you can get these beyond fabulous Celine pumps with a sequin overlay. Sequins can be dicey-- you don't want to look like you're going to be performing in the Tarrytown Community Theater revival of Cabaret. But black sequins are subtly glitzy; you won't look like a disco ball but you will catch everyone's eyes. But they also come in red and gold at Zappos, silver and purple for $169, and red and purple for $84.50 at Macy's. I love black sequins, but when there are red sequined pumps, you have to ask yourself, "What would Dorothy do?" and go for the red. Yes, everyone you see will make Wizard of Oz references, but they'll also think you are exceedingly fetching and playful.

You couldn't wear these with tights, but I really like these Steve Madden Seducce (not a typo, just a stupid spelling) Black heels, $19.99. Also, they're really practical because the t-strap ensures that your foot is staying in the shoe. There's no slingback strap slipping out or your foot stepping out of the front. And they're nice and minimal, so you can wear something a little more detailed and your shoes won't compete for people's attention.

Two things I'm not sure about are suede and pointy-toes (they make your feet look kind of scary and long!), but I like these Steve Madden Arouse pumps, $29.99. The combination of the two is sexy, I think. I know that I would constantly be sitting, crossing my legs, and touching my soft shoes, and encouraging cute boys to do the same.

I posted the red version of these shoes a few posts back, but the black version is also hot. From Isaac Mizrahi for Target, the Black Chris Mary-Jane pumps, $29.99, are the sort of shoes secretaries who sleep with their bosses wear. In a good way.

I like the Kenneth Cole sublabel Unlisted because some of the shoes have a bright red sole, Christian Louboutin-rip off style. I don't really believe in designer knock-offs, but I wouldn't be made if I was wearing these shoes and some stranger thought they were real Louboutins. These "Stylish" pumps, $45, have an awesome fake crocodile embossed upper. I like that the croc leather and red sole are very sex kitten, but the general shape of the shoe is very demure.


These shoes are super demure. They should call them Coquette shoes. They're called the Charming shoe, $44.99, which is a little uncreative. These shoes might be a little too sweet, with the pleated satin and the ribbon and the tulle and the bow. But I think it could all work if you were wearing something almost, but not quite, as sweet and girly.

Shopping Hodgepodge

Just yesterday I thought to myself, "I really shouldn't be doing any more shopping for a while." But then I walked by the kitchenware store Broadway Panhandler and saw, in the window, this dish towel with a photo of some 50's housewives and the text, "You mean shopping for more useless crap isn't the meaning of life?" And that was enough to convince me to keep spending money I don't have on things I don't need. Yay!

Incidentally, what do you guys think of that category of Retro Bitch kitschy stuff, like coasters and aprons and post-its and whatnot? Sometimes I think they're cute, but a part of me thinks it's trying so hard to be subversive that they're lame. They're not as bad as those t-shirts that say something like, "Mrs. Pitt" or whatever, but they're in the same general category of ickiness.
But anyway, the dish towel convinced me to keep buying things in order to find inner happiness. Danielle and I went to the flea market on Greenwich Avenue in the West Village, recently mentioned in the NYTimes. Since it just opened for the season a week or two ago, and we went pretty early in the morning, there weren't a ton of vendors there. But there was a guy selling rings with typewriter keys and earrings with Scrabble tiles, plus a really sweet old pocket watch that I might have been tempted to buy if it actually kept time. There was also a Polish woman selling vintage jewelry who told us about fifty times that the gemstones were from Italy, and Danielle got a sweet cocktail ring with an amber stone. But the best stand belonged to this woman selling delicate, understated gold and silver jewelry. I should have gotten her name, but if you go, look for a middle-aged Black woman selling gorgeous jewelry at really good prices, with a sign that says "Ask prices! Tags equal ugly jewelry." I got a bracelet with little silver ball beads strung unto about a dozen silver chains all twisted together. It kind of reminds me of tinsel, but not in a tacky way. I'm very excited to wear it, although it's sort of a bitch to try and put it on by myself. That's why I need a roommate, for help fastening bracelets and doing zippers.

After exhausting the flea markets stands (I think we'll go back in a month or so, and I'll try and remember to take photos), we split up and I headed back home. But I couldn't resist stopping into Banana Republic, especially since they had those giant "SALE!" signs up in the windows. But really, there wasn't that much stuff on sale. Working retail, I learned that the clothes on the designated sale wall aren't necessarily more discounted than clothes elsewhere, they just don't fit into anywhere else, and the sale window displays are more about not having displays relating to the new merchandise than anything inside the store. But anyway, I went inside and was browsing without any intention of buying, or even trying things on. But then I saw this cotton short trench coat, except electric blue instead of green and on sale instead of $148. I'm on a quest for a fun spring coat, but this wasn't quite it. There was something odd happening the shoulders and neck, so I couldn't buy it. But once I decided to try it on, that gave me leave to go grab a bunch of other things to try on, just to justify taking my clothes off. Although, I guess you could argue that I didn't need to take many pieces of clothing off to try on a coat, but... whatever. I tried on this long-sleeve sweetheart neckline top, $14.99, which is about the same color as the jacket. This is a cute top, and I was really close to buying it, but at the last second I stopped and thought, "this is going to be one of those tops that hangs in my closets for months at a time, and I'll see it and think, 'this is cute, I should wear it more often,' but then not actually ever wear it." So good for me for having the foresight to not buy something I'll like but not love.

I also tried on this golden cap-sleeve silk dress, $109.99, which I believe I included in my post about yellow. I especially wanted to try it on because Blake Lively is wearing it in last month's issue of Vogue, although you can't really see it in the photo. Also, has anyone else noticed how, outside of Gossip Girl, Blake Lively is just as hot as Serena but Leighton Meester isn't nearly as hot as Blair? I mean, she's still a totally cute girl, but she's lacking that special quality that makes Blair the center of every scene. Maybe it's the hair? Although, Leighton's t-strap shoes in this photo are the hottest of the hot.

So anyway, the dress, which really should come with the belt but unfortunately doesn't. It's a good dress, but not perfect. First, the fabric seemed a little worn, and there were little runs in the silk in the skirt. Sure, I bet a ton of people have tried on this one dress in the last two months, but it should be able to hold up a little better. And second, there was something weird going on with the back, where if I stood up straight with my shoulders back the fabric would gap out, like they made it half an inch too broad. It was very odd. I might be tempted to buy it if it gets more deeply discounted, but until it's under a hundred I just can't.

So BR was a bust in the clothing department, but I did get a sweet bracelet. I like the cuff shape because it's way easier to get on, plus I have relatively big wrists so it fits nicely and won't fall off. It's pretty different from all my other jewelry, but it's such a statement piece that trying to match it with earrings or a necklace is unnecessary. It's enough jewelry for a whole outfit. I also like that it's thick enough to cover up the red string I have tied around my left wrist and I never take off because I know it'll never go back on. Anyway, this bracelet is $35.99 in stores, but no longer available online. Sorry for the amateur photography in this post, by the way. I now have a whole new respect for jewelry photographers, because trying to figure out how to get enough light without causing a glare is tough.

So my last stop on yesterday's mini-shopping tour was Payless Shoes, which can be so hit or miss that I don't stop there that often. But I'm glad I did yesterday, because the second I saw the Anatole Pump by Lela Rose, $27.99, I knew I was going to buy it. You could wear these shoes just about anywhere: the office, to go out, even to class up a pair of jeans. It's a totally timeless shape, and the polka dot prints gives it a little bit of whimsy. Now that I have these shoes I'll have no excuse to wear flats (although, last night I did a lot of walking in heels and I got this really gross blood blister on the ball of my left foot, so that's maybe a really good excuse to wear flats. Was this an overshare? Are you totally grossed out? Just be glad I didn't take a photo and post it, because I was really tempted).

I didn't buy these Captain Boat Mocs, $16.99, but I was horribly tempted. They obviously fit with my fantasy always-on-a-yacht style, and could be cute summer shoes when my pedicure is looking a bit too worn for flip flops. But I just couldn't convince myself that I wouldn't look at these in three months and think, "Why in the world did I buy these stupid shoes?" If they were real leather (and still miraculously $16.99), I might have been more willing to give them a chance, but for now I'm saying no.

Leather Jackets

So spring might not seem like the most obvious time to be wearing a leather jacket. But that's exactly why you should! On those days when there's still a bit of a chill in the air, or the nights when you need a little extra warmth over your little spring dress, a leather jacket will keep you just warm enough. And you'll look like a bad ass!

In the past, I haven't bought a leather jacket because I was too scared I couldn't pull it off. I'm a bit of a Bambi, so I thought there was a big chance that wearing leather would make me look like this. But then the combined good influences of my roommate in Prague and Gossip Girl convinced me otherwise. From the first five minutes of the GG pilot, I wanted to find my own vintage tan leather jacket (and not only so I can recreate this outfit and go as Serena for Halloween). And then how awesome is this leather jacket? I covet it beyond all belief, and when this episode airs (this is a promo pic for a future ep) someone better tell me where it's from. See the buckle in front at her waist? Perfect.


Also, am I the only one who wishes she had to wear a school uniform so she could copy Serena's plaid skirts and loose ties? And those of you who had to wear uniforms, don't burst my bubble with reality by saying that you could never get away with Serena's outfits at their school.

I think this Short Trench by Guess, $179, could maybe find its way into Serena's wardrobe. Great color, fun buttons, and I love the buckles at the wrists. On the other hand, I find that coats with belts are hard to wear open, because the belt kind of falls all over the place and looks sloppy. And for spring, you gotta wear your jacket open so as to better show off what you're wearing underneath.



This Scuba Jacket, also by Guess and $179, would be great for that. I like how non-butch this jacket is, with the deep brown color and vertical seams. And it's nice and fitted so you won't get lost in it.


Speaking of feminine, this Generra Cropped Leather Jacket, way out of my price range at $695, makes leather sweet enough for lunch with your mom. Also, have I talked about how I have severe issues with this particular ShopBop model? She has such fantastic hair, but such an awful bitchface! I'm equally drawn and repelled by every thing she models.







Let's talk about price. Leather is expensive, because cows are so rare and so highly valued in our society. You're lucky to find a cute jacket under $100, and I definitely found more jackets costing a month's rent (in some town other than Manhattan). But here's a pretty cute Short Zipper Jacket in a fun shade of burgandy that's just $59.95. Ignore the Fake Housewife of Orange County inside the cute jacket. I also like this Waist Length Honey Colored Leather Jacket, also $59.95.




This one is cheaper than most because it's not a full leather jacket; Dillard's calls it a Zippered Cardigan with a metallic leather front, $69. I guess the front and part of the sleeves are leather and the rest is rayon. But that's good for warmer weather, and t's definitely a unique design. The cutout embroidery is just the icing on the cake.


So all the jackets I've shown so far have been colors other than black, because I think brown and tan leather and like are easier to pull off when you're sort of a wuss. But through my extensive research, I'm beginning to become convinced otherwise. Just look at these Ashley Olsen and Natalie Portman, two petite women not known for their ass-kicking toughness.



Let's start slow with some cropped jackets. You know, I'm always kind of impressed when magazines or websites do a splurge and save feature, since it seems hard to find items that are practically interchangeable from very different price points. But guess what? I have a splurge and save for you. The first, the Twenty9Twelve Yves Leather Jacket from Shopbop, is $690...











...and the second, the Halogen Zip Front Leather Jacket at Nordstrom, is $148 and 50% off!

The first has the full length sleeves, really cool pintucking at the waist and in the back, but I'm not crazy about the weird ruching on the bottom of the sleeves. The second has the sleek zipper, and doesn't it just look ridiculously soft? Also, it has four pockets in the front, so you would hardly need a purse.

I have just one more super expensive jacket, and then I promise I'll go back to under $200. I like this Vince Leather Motorcycle Jacket, $775, because it's not overly fashion-y. With the right outfit, you might be able to convince someone you actually know how to ride a motorcycle. It's pretty basic, but the slightly distressed look of the leather and the snap closure at the neck are badass.






This Leather Moto Jacket from Arden B, $128, is a bit simple, too, but the gold zippers make it just bling-y enough that you could wear it to a nicer bar or restaurant.










Also from Arden B is this Leather Pintuck Moto Jacket, $168. Pintucks are usually so prim and reserved, making them totally bomb on a leather jacket.





Remember, at the beginning, when I said how awesome a leather jacket would look over a light spring dress? Well, I would be remiss if I didn't give you some options for dresses also. The first is the Cut-Out Shift Dress from Old Navy, $17.70. You can't really see the detail on the front in the photo of the white, so I'm including the black version too.











I'm completely obsessed with next dress from Alice + Olivia, who always makes great frocks. The Ombre Rosette Tube dress, $297, is like the sky in dress form. Yes, it's a little shapeless, but a highly structured dress would be wrong when trying to capture essence of sky, right? Just think about how fierce those chiffon rosettes will look peaking out from underneath your leather jacket. I'm including three photos because I think it's just that fantastic.

Easter Dresses

Happy Easter, everyone! Right now I'm in the airport, waiting for my flight back to New York to board and eating taffy with little bunnies on them that I found in my Easter basket this morning. My family brought me to the airport but barely slowed down to push me out of the car, since they were all heading to church. Hmph. It is undeniably true that I would not have gone to church with them even if I didn't have to go back to school, but it is also undeniably true that dresses to wear to church (or, even better, brunch) on Easter morning are really fun to shop for. Look how much fun Judy Garland and Fred Astaire are having in the movie Easter Parade! I highly recommend you try and track this movie musical down if you want to do have a theme movie night tonight.

If I was really committing to the Easter theme I would post photos of all sorts of giant hats for you to buy and look ridiculous in as your stroll down Fifth Avenue. But in a match between hats and dresses, dresses will win 7 days a week and twice on Sundays (thrice on Easter Sundays!).

I think this Arden B. Floral A-Line Dress, $148, is the quintessential Easter dress. Floral? Pastal? Chiffon? Waist sash? Full skirt? All check. But the pleated cross-top and color block at the bottom hem keeps it young and fun, like "Who wants to celebrate Jesus with some Long Island Ice Teas?"

The Free People Pretty Poppies Dress, $128, is a little less in-your-face, but still, so pretty. But why is it that all the Free People brand stuff on the Urban Outfitters website is really cute, but when I look at the Free People website I'm like, "What hippie shit where they smoking when they designed this shit?" Maybe they tone down the arts-and-craftsy whickawhack look for the UO stuff, but go wild with the crochet and florettes on things that are only by FP. Anyway, I adore the blue and white striped sash and straps on this dress.

On the Gap website they recommend toughing up this Strapless Empire dress, $69.50, with a black leather jacket. I love that idea, but not for Easter, of course. This dress comes with straps that are obviously removable, but I suspect that the boning in the front of the bodice would keep it in place well enough. And pretty print, right? It's a bit like toile, but toned down so it's not overwhelming.





The Marc by Marc Jacobs Wave Print Halter Dress, $198, is a little less girly, I think, with the unconventional color combination. And I like that it's an abstract print, almost simple stripes but with some messiness.





Just to go from end of the designer spectrum to the other, here's the Forever 21 Floral Eyelet Dress, $24.80. It's so feminine and sweet, with the lace trim and the eyelet on the skirt. It also comes in a light yellow that'd be appropriate for Easter, but personally I like the pink.



The AE Garden Sundress, $39.95, is great because it's not so foofy that you couldn't wear it to class or a party or places other than church and your sorority meetings. Plus, it has pockets, which I am hugely in favor of when it comes to dresses.



Speaking of sorority girls, I had a suspicion that Lily Pulitzer would have some great Easter dresses. The first one I liked was this Marlon Embroidered Dress, $198. Orange accents on crisp white fabrics are one of my favorite color combinations; it looks so fresh and fun. You can barely see the embroidery on the dress, but there are oversized pink and orange daisies all over.



What is better for Easter than white linen? The Penelope dress, $298, would make you look both super tan and very skinny (with the vertical stitching) and also pretty busty (with the sweetheart neckline). That's pretty much my big three dress wishes, right there.



I don't know why, since I almost never wear shift dresses like this, and I'm rarely on board for some paisley, but I'm kind of irrationally in love with the Jacqueline Dress Pique, $248. It's cute, right? I don't know, I like the keyhole at the neck and the three flowers... it's just totally working for me.



So I realize that none of these dresses are exactly modest, and unless you want to be like Lyla from Friday Night Lights (who is constantly going to church in these little sundresses and looking unappropriately babely, if you ask me), you need a cardigan. I could write epic odes about the majestic beauty of cardigans, but for now I'll just give you a few options so you don't get any pervy looks from the priest.

For dresses I think a cropped cardigan is best, because if there's too much sweater going on I start to look a little grandma. I covet this cropped ruffle cardigan, $49.50, from the Gap. Assymetrical can be hard to pull off, but I think the pale pink helps soften it. This cardigan also comes in navy blue, white and gray, all exceptional cardigan colors. If you don't like the ruffle, Gap also has a basic cropped cardigan, $39.50 (that little ruffle cost ten extra dollars? Pffph) in good spring colors.






Here's another cardigan with a little more detail, from Free People. The Boho Tie Waist Cardigan, $98, is a little more chunky but has the slightly open weave and cool buttons. Black is a little anti-Easter, but you'll be able to wear it with anything.



I know I said cropped cardigans were the way to go, but sometimes, with a shorter, simple dress, a super long cardigan (almost as long as your dress) can look super hot. The Lux Basic Long Cardigan, $48, would also look great belted, I think.


For a grand finale I was going to scan and upload a picture of me and my sister wearing matching Easter dresses when I was 2 and she was 4, and we're holding little stuffed bunnies and looking way too freaking adorable, but I couldn't find a scanner so: use your imagination.

Spring Break, Woohoo!

Spring break is almost over for me, but that's not going to stop me from shopping for all the hypothetical spring breaks I might have had if I made it to one of these exotic locations (and not just my backyard).

Cancun:

1. Betsey Johnson Sequin Bandeau Top, $88 and bottom $70.
2. BCBG Max Azria Macramé Shimmer Bikini Top, $86 and bottom $68.
3. Old Navy patent slides, $14.50
4. Bebe Strapless Swim Cover Dress, $44.80
5. Becca Reversible Bikini Top, $68 and bottom $50
(I think reversible bathing suits are the world's best invention, since not only do you get double your money's worth but then there's no lining for sand to get trapped in!)

Barbados:
1. J.Crew Polynesian Burnout Tunic, $58
2. Gold Anchor String Halter, $48 and hipster bikini bottom, $46
3. Mermaid's Boutique Crochet Mini Skirt, $138
4. American Eagle Jersey Beach Dress, $39.50
5. Target Canvas Cargo Sling, $9.99

Cape Cod:
1. Old Navy Pique Tube Dress, $19.50
2. American Eagle Nantucket Rope Bracelet, $9.50
3. J.Crew Bright-stripe French Top, $42 and lowrider bikini bottom, $40
4. Isola D'Elba Terry Hooded Tunic, $59.50
5. GapBody Belted Cut-out one-piece, $50
6. AE Flower Tote, $24.95

The Yacht Your Boyfriend Built and Named "True Love"
1 and 2. Anthropologie Spindrift Top, $58 and boyshorts, $58
3. Mossimo Tote Bag, $16.99
4. GapBody Terry Halter Dress, $24.99
5. Vix Swimwear Alli Bikini, $132

Saint Tropez:

1. Lux Retro Solid One Piece, $88
2. DKNY Teal Smocked Deep-V Cover Up Dress, $76
3. J.Crew Jillian Espadrilles, $118
4. Victoria's Secret Polka Dot Bandeau top, $20 and bottom $19

San Diego:
1. J.Crew Strapless Seaside Eyelet-trim dress, $78
2. Twister beach towel, $9.99 (I want one of these so bad)
3. Lux Tartan Pin Up Halter, $42 and bottom, $48
4. Madras Balconet Top, $34 and double-string bottom, $20
5. J.Crew Jeweled Posy Capri Sandals, $118

Palm Springs:


1. J.Crew Patterned Fabric and Gosgrain flip-flops, $29.50
2. Betsey Johnson Beauty Cut-out Bandeau, $78 and skirted buttom, $98
3. AE Garden Sundress, $39.95
4. J.Crew Polka-dot Padded Underwire Glamour Top, $50 and bottom, $40
5. Lindsey Condron Party Magnet bikini, $68 for the top and $64 for the bottom


The Upper East Side:

The Harajuku Red Polka Dot Bikini are around $40 for a top and $36 for a bottom. But no price is too high to pay to be Blair Waldorf.

I am the best goddamn dancer in the American Ballet Academy. Who the hell are you?

I think, deep down, every girl under age 40 still wants to be a ballerina. But not the "Oh, I have deformed feet and never eat!" kind of realistic ballerina, but the Jodie Sawyer "Solo on stage to The Way You Make Me Feel and then bend down, pop up wearing red pointe shoes, completely different make up, and cornrows" kind of ballerina. Actually, maybe I just really like Center Stage.

But anyway, I was walking around Famous Footwear with my sister yesterday, because if there's one thing I believe in it's discount shoes. The goal was cute Mary Janes, but then I saw some shoes that instantly brought to mind that ballerina classic, the pointe shoe. But instead of the typical ballet flat, it had a great wooden heel! And yes, I know that real pointe shoes don't have a bow and pleating, but you can see the inspiration, right?

Online I could only find the Steve Madden Lexi Heel, $25 in store and $44.99 online, in black, but this shoe also comes in a pale pink (if you want to go very literal with the ballerina thing), and then a deep rich purple. It's kind of like the color of this dress, which I'm positively lusting over. Yes, it's way too slutty for me to ever wear in public (in addition to the deep v-neck, it's backless), but it's hot, right? And on sale from $215 to $54! I found the Tart Vixen Halter dress at Revolveclothing.com, which is the website Mindy Kaling recommended in her latest post on spats (and the less said about the spats, the better).

The Best Thing That Has Happened To Me Since Flats Came Back Into Style

Yes, it is true.

I spent a fairly good portion of my Spring Break trolling the aisles of Target and Walgreens to find this mysterious product my mother kept referring to as “those nail polish pens, you know, the Sally Hansen nail polish pens.” Needless to say, like the Fountain of Youth, I thought such a fantastic product would remain lost to me forever. Because, really, why would a cosmetic company ever be so adventurous as to make a product that’s 1) intelligent and 2) the equivalent of a middle schooler coloring their fingernails with highlighters.

My mother is the greatest conquistadora of all, my friends, because she finally found them!!

I received two Color Quick pens in my Easter basket, way down at the bottom. I felt like I had discovered that wee little pot of gold at the end of the rainbow, because let me tell you: they are freaking awesome!!!

I can’t be the only one that’s completely retarded when it comes to painting nails. I’m just awful at it. I blame the following: my weak left hand, my complete and total lack of patience, and, primarily, the fact that I never really screw the lid back on the bottle tight enough (thereby making the polish all goopy and ucky, for those of you looking for scientific terms).

But the Color Quick sticks (heh!) have a little brush at the bottom and all of the polish is loaded at the top. You click the Color Quick stick (hehe!) right at the top a few times and you’re good to go—it gives you just the right amount of polish to paint your nails, and not your skin. The first time you use it you’re going to have to do 3 coats instead of the recommended 2, only because you have to, shall we say, get the juices in that little clicky sticky going. They don’t have that many colors yet (hey, this is Sally Hansen, not OPI with their stupid witty polish colors like Don’t Melbourne the Toast), but they do have all of the basics. I just put the black on and it worked like a charm—and black usually requires a few more coats.

Great for quick touch ups, dries faster than you would believe, and looks lovely!

Sally Hansen Color Quicks: $7.99

Target Love

They say that Manhattan has everything you could ever possibly want or need, but this is a lie. Manhattan does not have a Target. Really, if forced to name the top thing I would change about Manhattan, it would be the lack of Target. Sure, the one in Brooklyn is pretty easy to get to and is totally huge, but it's a very rare day when I have enough gumption to go to another borough for shopping.

But there are Targets all over my hometown, and before every school break I obsessively troll Target.com in search of things I want to buy. When I got back from Europe in December, I was at Target within 12 hours of my plane landing.

My goal for today's trip to Target was to find some cute Mary-jane shoes, which are my new shoe obsession. I especially the Red Chris Mary Jane Pump by Isaac Mizrahi, $29.99, but they only had it in black and half a size too big. But how hot are those skinny double straps? And I think the 3 inch heel is a good height; you get a little bit taller but aren't going to topple over at a moment's notice.


That's my problem with the Francesca Cone Heel shoe, $20.99, also by Isaac Mizrahi. Cute, but just not quite tall enough. I'm a big fan of the gunmetal grey, though, and they also come in a great maroon called "oxblood."

You know what really bothers me about Target.com? How one product will be listed separately for each of the different colors it comes in. It's very annoying, because I like to be able to click the little "show product in white" button so I can compare the different colors directly before deciding what to get.


Here's a very straight-forward Mary Jane Skyler pump in patent leather. They look a little cheap, but they're $19.99 so... they are cheap.




But don't these Olive Mary Jane Pumps, $20.99, not look cheap at all? I love the contrast trim and button. It's very retro classy.


I also hoped to check out the Jovovich-Hawk collection (yes, that's the same Mila Jovovich who was in The Sixth Element), but almost everything was gone. I find the Go International collections to be kind of spotty, though. I mean, I love it in theory, and I have a great blue coat from the Libertine collection, but when I see most of the clothing in person and try it on, I'm usually not impressed.

I did like the Converse One Star line, however. Very casual but still cute and wearable. I'm particularly in love with this Baseball tankini, $16.99 for the top and $16.99 for the bottom (which seems wrong--aren't bikini bottoms supposed to be cheaper?). The top is so cute I'd be tempted to wear it as a shirt to a spring training game.


So those were all the things I didn't buy. But here's what I did.

In this photo the Merona Print Trench Coat, $39.99, looks horrifically busy. And I can't deny it; it is a whole lot of print. And I almost never wear anything with a print because I think it looks overwhelming. And I'm still not totally sure about this coat-- do you guys think the print is too reminiscent of a sofa? Or is it just fun and whimsical enough to be perfect for spring? I wish the belt (which you can barely see in the photo) was a solid color instead of the same fabric as the rest of the coat; I think it would help break up the print into more halves that would be manageable for the eye to handle. But I'm a huge fan of belts on long coats, so I won't complain too much.

The other thing I got was an Xhilartion head scarf, $7.99. It's the same style as this one, except mine is white with big, navy blue polka dots. It's kind of like the scarf I'm embarassed to admit I want from Lauren Conrad's collection of overpriced, under-designed clothes. It's cute, right? But I did not want to pay $25 for a piece of cotton that probably cost 6 cents to make, so good thing I went to Target.

Midterm Fashion

I don't know about you guys, but this week was midterm hell for me. Lots of late nights, time clocked in the library, and very little showering. But it got me thinking about how the right clothes/gear can help you study, and how maybe the right outfit can help you get a few more points on that exam (oh, how I wish I had worn my "negative capability" shoes to my Brit Lit midterm!).

Comfort, obviously, is key. When studying I like to wear ballet flats or other slip-on shoes so I can easily take them off and sit cross-legged or put my feet up on an adjacent chair or whatever. I'm a big fan of Xhilaration flats from Target, $14.99, although you should definitely put some gel insoles in the bottom for a little extra padding. They come in about a billion different prints (I have basic black and a fun gold), but I think this black-and-white floral design is especially Ivory Tower classy.

As for clothes, I'd just say jeans and a cute t-shirt. Make sure to bring some sort of thick sweater or puffy jacket, in case you want to take cat-nap. But one way to keep yourself awake: scented highlighters!

I truly believe that highlighters are the number 1 most essential tool for studying; I'd even put them ahead of lecture notes, copies of the reading, and Wikipedia. If you have the right highlighters, there's no way you'll fail. Last spring, at NYU's Strawberry Fest, I got a mini-pink highlighter that was, naturally, strawberry scented. It was pretty much the love of my life-- it made marking important passages in Equiano's "True and Fantasic Account of My Life as a Lying Son of a Bitch Who is in Every Anthology Ever Created and Probably Made it All Up, Although I'll Concede that African Slave or Not He Probably Had a Tough Life." Anyway, somewhere between then and now I lost that highlighter, and I'm very tempted to buy a replacement online. This website, Everything Smells, sells a wide variety of scented highlighters! There's ice cream scents (chocolate, mint, vanilla and strawberry), candy scents (apple, grape, lemon and watermelon), and the kind of weird movie scents (buttered popcorn, chocolate mint, orange soda and cherry licorice). These are very petite highlighters (around the size of your thumb), so you can throw a couple in your book bag and color-coordinate your notes. They're 79 cents, and non-toxic!

But oh no! These highlighters are making you hungry! But it's 1 am and nothing's open. Thank god for Insomnia Cookies. Every night, from 8pm to 2:15 am, the good people at Insomnia Cookies will deliver sweets to your dorm (well, not my dorm, since it's so far from campus) or library, and you'll get the sugar rush you need to keep studying. I've never ordered from Insomnia Cookies, but I've heard nothing but good things and I dream of the night that I'm working hard enough to warrant placing an order. They service schools other than NYU, and you can see the list here. They don't deliver to Columbia-- hehe, suck it. Most of the cookies are 90 cents each, and you can order brownies and milk, too. There's a minimum order of $6.00, so I give you permission to order a dozen and tell yourself, "Oh, I'll bring the rest home for my roommate/save them for tomorrow/give them to my fellow studiers," and then eat them all when you're about to pass out at 5:30 am.


But if Insomnia Cookies doesn't service your campus? Hello, go to the vending machines! I really like studying in the library, because then I get to take little vending machine field trips. I ask someone respectable looking to watch my stuff (because if I take it with me someone will steal my seat or use the outlet I staked out, and also it prevents me from giving up and going home as soon as I walk by the exit), take the elevator down to the atrium, go down to the basement, look at the selection in all three food vending machines and four drink machines, make a choice, hopefully find someone I know in the lounge to chat with, and then head back upstairs. On a good night I can waste half an hour getting a snack.

What you get from the vending machine is your own choice, of course, but I like a snack that's fragmented, like M&M's instead of a chocolate bar. This way, I can implement a food-based reward system, like for every page of notes I read I can have three Goldfish crackers. If you're in the quiet study room where there's no food or drink, gummy bears are awesome because they're a mostly silent candy. Also, you can pretend that there's some sort of fruit serving in what you're eating, and thus feel less guilty.

But back to clothes: what should you wear to the exam? Today I decided to take the "clothes make the girl" approach and dressed as if I was perfectly confident and prepared. Woke up early to shower, blow-dried my hair, wore a dress, the whole bit. But then, as I watched my fellow students file into the exam room, I realized this was a mistake! I should have looked like shit so my professor would see me and say to herself, "There's a student who killed herself studying last night; I'm going to give her an extra point just out of pity." And I think I would have gotten two extra points if I had slummed it in NYU gear (because who doesn't like school spirit, right?). Perferably it would all be clothes I got for free freshman year, but the NYU Bookstore will do, too. I'm not going to patronize you by listing prices and links, since I know you're not going to buy a pair of NYU flip flops.


Happy studying!

Men's Wallets

I got a request to do a post on men's wallets, and since all of my guy friends are too lazy to shop for themselves (and I'm looking for any reason not to study for midterms) here are a few options:

Really, guys don't have to try too hard with wallets. It's more about what's inside the wallet, if you know what I'm saying. My only stipulation is that it should be leather, or some leather-like material, and have lots of little pockets to hide condoms in.

If you're not a trust fund baby, you can still impress the ladies if you go for a wallet with a label's signature print that'll be recognizable to girls who read Lucky. I like this Coach one because it's subtle enough that other dudes won't think you're lame and you probably (but not definitely) won't get thrown through the window of a dive bar when you whip it out. The Coach Heritage Stripe Double Billfold is $148.

Slightly but not terribly amusing side story: when I met my best friend's boyfriend the three of us went to lunch, and I noticed that his wallet had the Louis Vuitton logo on the outside of it. After he left, I said to her, "This is a weird question, but is your boyfriend really rich?" Apparently the LV wallet was a fake, and also maybe someone gave it to him, but I really liked the idea that he's been using it with no idea what the LV print is kind of a thing.

Going a little cheaper is this Cole Haan croc embossed wallet, $51 (on sale from $85 on Bluefly!). The worn-in leather, the metal stud-- this is a badass wallet. I like the flip-out ID flap, too.





Is it me or do most men's wallets not have coin purses? I guess men always have pockets to put their change in. But this Flyby International Traveler wallet, $45, from Fossil has one. They called it a "snap coin holder," and I'm imaging the giant brainstorming session that went on to come up with an alternate phrase for the femme-y "coin purse." Also, the marbleized texture of the leather is pretty cool.



Speaking of cool, this wallet from Urban Outfitters is called the Fonz Wallet, $22. From the outside it looks like a totally boring wallet, but then you pop it open and see those sweet criss-cross card holders and the check billfold lining. That Fonz always did have a surprise in his back pocket. This wallet also comes in black, but the lining in that one has a lot more pink and kind of looks like the tablecloth your grandma will put on the kid's table at your big family Easter dinner.

UO has another wallet that I want to include just because of the name. This is the Obey Dirty Work wallet, $35, so it should be perfect for that guy you know who always has dead hookers in the back of his car. But it seems like, with the fake vintage logo and the paint splatters and the freaking guitar pick holders inside, this wallet is just trying way too hard. Just like Norm MacDonald! This is one of those things that might be ok to use if you found it in a trunk of your dad's old stuff from his hippie days and it still smelled like clove cigarettes, but when you buy it from Urban Outfitters it's not acceptable.

Finally, if I were a guy, I would just forgo a wallet altogether and use a badass money clip. Preferably from Tiffany, with something engraved on it like "The OG," and it'll be a gift from the Mob elders when I finally get "made" (I obviously watched Goodfellas last week, and it helped temper my dislike of all things Scorsese. But I felt it didn't do a good enough job of describing how someone becomes "made." I figured out from context clues that it isn't getting shot in the back of the head in someone's rec room, to sounds of the guitar solo in Layla. Is it a ceremony, like a baptism or the ritual Wormtail performed to bring Voldemort back? Or do they just sit you down, shake your hand, give you a money clip, and say, "Congratulations, now you're made." It's really bothering me that I don't know this). Then I'll pay for everything in cash, hand out $100 tips to the car park guy, and do a lot of snorting of certain substances. The classic silver money clip from Tiffany is $95, which will be chump change when I become part of the Mob.

Life, Love, and Lilly

Okay, now I know approximately five of our readers immediately knew what I was going to be posting about when they saw the title. The others… not so much. Because unless you go to school back East, frequent country clubs, are a sorority girl in the South or are 65+ years old, you likely have never heard of the fresh, preppy cult that is Lilly Pulitzer. (Side note: same family as that Pulitzer, though I think she married into the family?) Bree wears it on Desperate Housewives, and I know a pink coat was on Gossip Girl (my vindication!!), and if you’ve seen the Nicole Kidman version of the Stepford Wives, the movie is practically a Lilly ad.

I certainly hadn’t heard of Lilly when I came to school—and yet I managed to become indoctrinated in said fresh, preppy cult in a matter of weeks. I’m not really sure what it was that ultimately won me over. The cute dress styles? The versatile skirts? The pastel animal prints and patterns?


The truth of the matter is that not everyone can wear—or would want to wear—Lilly. Take a look at the pattern samples from this past Spring. Yes. Multi Princess of the Jungle is a typical pattern. I have dresses with monkeys, a skirt with giraffes and all sorts of flowers. My sister literally starts retching when she sees me wearing one, and to be honest, I never thought I would. But it’s like you step into some alternate dimension when you see a precious little Lilly dress—one where it is okay to buy that $300 dress with happy fish or sleeping lions or playful tigers. We, the Cult of Lilly, do not recommend the patterned Capri pants for beginners, anyone under the age of 40, and all those that aspire to give the impression that their butt is, in fact, small.

I could never imagine Julia or Danielle wearing this kind of Lilly in New York, but the Betsy Dress is something that you’d be likely to see a few sorority girls wear a bit further south or west. Lilly is, in some cases, the unofficial uniform of rush (as well as Easter, but anyway). It runs $198 - $228, which is actually on the low side for Lilly. What I can tell you about this style is that it’s incredibly flattering. You have your empire waist and a bit of pleating around the midsection to, you know, hide a food baby or that winter pudge you packed on intentionally for warmth purposes.

It might be a good idea to mention here that part of the reason why Lilly is a bit steep is because the clothing is of REALLY good quality. I’m a bit of a pig messy eater, but I’ve never had any problem washing stains out by hand. Granted, it’s probably not the same story for silk, but Lilly kept the idea of quality in mind when she first started out in California. I always equate the price with the quality, which eases the agonized screams of my bleeding bank account. If you look on ebay, you’ll see that these dresses last YEARS.

That aside, I do think that Lilly is moving in a more mature, refined direction when it comes to patterns. I actually caught my lovely sister looking through my catalogue and finding things that she would wear. Unfortunately, the more Lilly tames her Jungle Fever tendencies, the more crap I want to buy.

For example, remember a while back when Danielle and Julia were championing the virtues of the color yellow? Lilly presents you with a few pretty and girly styles that you could wear in the spring and summer and not look like a four year old:



The Dexter Dress is made of silk and runs at $258.


the Angelette dress ($298)


And my favorite the Tracey dress (on sale for $114).




Here are a few more cute choices for the summer: the Tierney dress ($268) and the the Snappy Skirt ($118). I bought the Snappy Skirt when I was at home last week and it’s probably my favorite thing I got while I was there. It’s very classic and preppy—in a nice, Oh, of course, darling, let’s go sailing on our Yacht! kind of way. Check out the Paley Cardigan if you’re looking for a cute Spring cardigan pattern ($118).

And, finally, to conclude this initiation into the delightful world of Lilly, may I recommend their polo shirts?




They’re a bit steep at $65, but sometimes you can find them at Nordstrom Rack or Loehman’s for a little less. Like I mentioned before, Lilly is geared toward an active sort of lifestyle (you know, as active as lawn parties and country clubs can get), so I’ve never had any problems getting out stains. They also are less prone to getting stretched out (which is an issue with my Polo shirts). The fabric isn’t flimsy and the fit is awesome. I honestly can’t recommend them enough.

If you’re a man, Lilly has some truly… remarkable selections to offer you as well.

Lilly Pulitzer is a religion, and I’m not the only one praying at the shrine.

Update on Slips

So I bought some stuff from Urban Outfitters online, and I'm going to tell you about it.

The bulk of my purchase was slips, some of which I posted about previously.

My favorite, by far, is the most impractical. The Lulu in Hollywood slip, $14.99, has these ridiculous accordian pleats on the bottom that will make it really tough to wear underneath anything. But it's so fun to wear on its own that I had to keep it. I do have a dark grey dress that's super low-cut, and I'm thinking that the yellow lace will look great peaking out at the neckline, and the fabric might be heavy enough to hide the pleats.

I was apparently smoking crack when I bought this other Damsel strappy gold slip, because why in the world would I need two yellow slips? It was $11.99, but I was sensible and returned it. I kept the royal blue one I bought in the same style, though. This style of slip runs a little longer than I like, and if it wasn't slightly see-through I could wear it as a regular dress in the summer. Maybe, when it warms up, I'll get creative with layering and figure it out.

This Alchimie slip, $28, doesn't look very cute on the model, but in person it's everything you want in a slip (except maybe a little too long, also). The satin is super smooth, like a second skin, and the lace details at the top and bottom are subtly sexy (they should call this the alliteration slip). I've been having some static cling issues, though, so I'm going to have to google how to fix that before I wear it.

I was so excited to wear the Lace Trim Tie Front Slip, $19.99, but this one was a total bust. The main problem was the cups, which not only were on the small size, but also seemed to be pointed out, away from each other. Since I don't have little girl boobs that are underneath my arms, the cups were all bunched weirdly and I just looked uncomfortable. Should have been so cute, but wasn't cute at all. Returned it.

I also got the Carved Leaf Headband, $12.00, which is a little bit uncomfortable behind my ears but makes me feel like one of the non-humans in A Midsummer's Night Dream (were they nymphs? fairies? I can't remember). I've worn it once and already gotten a compliment, from a boy, no less. Thanks for validating my self-worth, Yeison!

I've wanted this Little Birch Jewelry Stand, $26, for ages. It was on my Christmas list, but my parents didn't love me enough to buy it. After Christmas it was backordered and I wanted to wait until it went on sale, but when I decided to buy this other stuff I decided to throw in the jewelry tree too, and it arrived just a few days after everything else. I immediately untangled all my earrings and necklace that were in a heaping mess in a drawer, and artfully placed them on the stand. I'm hoping that being able to see my jewlery, having it on my desk in plain view, will encourage me to mix it up a little. The one thing I don't like about it is that most of the branches are too thick to hang my daintier earrings on, but otherwise it's fabulous.

Trench Coats

When I was making the post on rainy day gear I planned a whole section on trench coats, but then I found enough cute ones to warrant a post of their own. But really, rainy days are the best time to wear a trench coat. Other times, it can be too "All the President's Men" (I haven't seen the movie or read the book, but in my mind, Watergate involved lots of people in trench coats skulking around parking structures. This is probably due to Dick) or "creepy flasher." But on a rainy day, a trench coat will make you look like a modern urban girl whose babeliness is too strong to be tampered by bad weather.

First stop is the cropped trench, which is good when it's only drizzling a little. The Gap version, $69.50, comes in tan and pink, which are my two favorite colors for trenches. I love the belt knotted to the side, and while the three-quarter length sleeves aren't my favorite, I could probably make do.

Target has some great trench coats right now. I love this Full Skirt Trench Coat, 69.99, because it's long enough to hide a shorter dress or skirt, and so when you're outside it's like "Look how cute I am in this coat dress!" and then when you're inside, "Look how cute I still am in this regular dress!"

Isaac Mizrahi has a few, too. The Lazer Cut Eyelet Trench, $49.99, has eyelet details on the bottom hem and back panel. I think that's genius, to add a really feminine detail to a men's wear classic. I included a photo of the back, where you can see it more clearly.


















In general I'm a big fan of buttons, but this Wrap Trench Coat, $44.99, works pretty well. It runs the risk of going into robe territory, but I think the exaggerated collar saves it. There are buttons concealed within the coat, so you don't have to worry about it slipping open if you happen to be walking around town in just lingerie, garters and a trench coat (as we all do). The buckles at the wrist cuffs are really fun, too.

If you want a little more color and nice, clean lines, this Via Spiga Snap-front jacket, $180, is it. It's pretty minimalist for a trench (in fact, Macy's doesn't even list it as a trench, but it's close enough for me), but the O-ring belt threaded through the grommets makes it anything but boring. The wide collar might be a bit much on a young woman, though.

Here's a trench made directly for young woman, by (duh) Forever 21. The Satin Trench Coat, $34.80, is so fierce I probably couldn't pull it off. Wide belt? Cropped puff sleeves? Double breasted? Fucking satin? This is the J.Lo of trench coats. It probably isn't waterproof at all, but J.Lo is impervious to the elements, obvi.

But what if you're more of a Beyonce than a J.Lo? And the idea of buying a $35 coat makes you vomit? Go to Burberry. They're famous for their classic trenches, and rightly so. I'm going to let Kate Moss convince you.

Kate Moss is so dope that even stodgy old classic Burberry was like, "You do coke and fuck Pete Doherty? That's cool." Sometimes I think that all those other model bitches should just give it up and realize that they'll never be as good as Kate Moss, so they might as well go home and let a real model get the job done. Ugh, love her.

But back to trenches, and Beyonce. Just look at this gold leather trench and make the connection yourself. It's $2495, but think of how much wear you'll get out of it when you're resorting in Saint Tropez and it rains that one day! Also, the description says this coat features "two gunflaps." I'm not quite sure what those are (is it the things on the shoulders? Maybe one of our more street-smart readers can explain), but when you're hanging out with Jay-Z it can't hurt to have some extra gunflaps.

So my last two trench coats are vintage, one-of-a-kind finds from Etsy, so if you like them and they're in your size, don't hesitate. This Canary Yellow 60's Belted Mini Trench is $54. You'd definitely have to play down your other accessories with this coat-- no fun patterned rain boots or umbrella when you're rocking the yellow with silver accents. Also, this post is making me realize how fun I think grommets are. Maybe it's because I like anything that pretends to be functional but isn't really.

From the same seller, the Belted Blue Vintage Trench is $36. The appeal of this jacket is obviously the color, and with a blue like that you'll be out-prettying the flowers all spring.




Lastly, some more babes in trench coats, including Kate Moss caught out in the wild!

Rainy Day Gear

It's pouring in New York right now, and it sucks. There's still a little bit of the Arizona girl in me who thinks rain is something special, and I blame her for deciding it was a good idea to walk from my dorm to campus (about 20 blocks) and back instead of waiting for the bus. Dumb Arizona girl-- it was a bad idea. But I did wear the rain boots I bought over winter break, so I got to stomp through puddles no problem. Despite using an umbrella, my entire body was soaked when I finally got back to my dorm, but everything from the knee down was perfectly dry!

I have these Buckle Wellies from the Gap, $39.50, except mine are dark blue with pink trim. The inside has multi-colored stripes, which is sort of neat except that the bottom of my socks always get insanely stained with color. The other way my boots are different is that I bought them for like 4 dollars, due to my employee discount and some major price-slashing. When I worked at the tail end of the holiday season my store got like 80 pairs of rain boots, and no one bought any. Surprisingly, there's no market for rain boots in Arizona! Especially in the winter, when monsoon season is a good six months away. Anyway, the thing I really like about these boots is the buckle at the top, so you can make them a little bigger if you want to tuck in your jeans, or tighten them up if you're bare-legged.

My dream is to get some Burberry rain boots, because I'm a label whore. Well, not really. I usually hate accessories with a designer logo slathered all over, like those LV purses and whatnot. But for some reason, the classic Burberry check just does it for me. Who cares that you're dropping major cash on footwear that isn't particularly flattering and you'll only wear in certain weather? It's Burberry! The Check Rainboots are $170.

Because rain boots are an item you'll wear so rarely, and then only on days were you tend to be cranky, I give everyone permission to buy really silly, ridiculous rain boots. Like these Chooka boots with little pink bunnies, $60! There are also the Peacock City boots by Chooka, but I'm not sure if these are fierce or freaky. Doesn't it kind of look like a ton of little alien eyes?




The last Chooka boot I really like is the Koi Tattoo. All these boots seem a little pricey to me at $60, but on the other hand, if you buy cheap rain boots and they're ineffectual, then they're useless. An extra 20 bucks for boots that will keep your toes dry and warm is worth it.



J.Crew always has good Wellies, and these pewter with pink elephants boots, $65, are perfectly whimsical.






If you're looking for something cheaper, and I always am, Target's where it's at. These Comic Town rain boots, $19.99, will bring you back to a childhood spent reading about Betty, Veronica and the whole gang. Plus, you'll always have something to read when you're bored during class. Oh, and Target has anchor rain boots, too, so I'll be able to wear my anchor necklace, earrings, bracelet and t-shirt with the boots and look like a total nutjob!







The other thing you need, obviously, is an umbrella. Personally, I go for function over form. Every time it rains in New York you see a graveyard of torn and broken umbrellas in corner trashcans. It's sad. Freshman year I had this really cute polka-dot umbrella for Target that I was so excited to buy and then always angry to use. It flipped inside out constantly, and I couldn't go 5 feet without seeing another girl with the same umbrella. So the next year I went to REI and got a black umbrella with one of those automatic expand and collapse buttons, with all sorts of steel reinforcements and technology whatevers. I loved it, and I never wanted another.

But I either left it at home or it's in some box in the back of my closet, so I've been borrowing from Danielle's esteemed collection of umbrellas. I would let her blog about her own purchases, but I'm on a roll here so: she recently bought two great umbrellas from Echo Design. The Folding Vintage Dot umbrella, $38, is adorable and classic, and the Medallion Clear Stick umbrella, $52, is going to be perfect for rainy April days that are still a bit warm.

From the same website, I really love the Squares Umbrella, $42. I would never wear clothes with geometric prints, but somehow, on an umbrella, it's all ok. It kind of reminds me of bathroom tile, but in a good way.

The Museum of Modern Art Store is known for its witty designs, and the Sky umbrella, $48, is one of the best. It also comes in a collapsible version, but I say, if you're buying from Moma, get the old man wooden handle cane version. It's classier, and easier to dance with should you find yourself in a music video.

The Color Spectrum umbrella, $24, is a bit more in-your-face with its fun colors, but sometimes, when its raining hard enough, subtlety is no longer necessary.

What do you guys think of those dome umbrellas? I feel like they're great in theory, but whenever I see someone on the street using one I can't help mentally calling them a douche. Maybe I'm just jealous that they're dry and I'm wet. Here's a clear bubble dome umbrella for $19.95 on Amazon.



Finally, maybe the next time it's raining you should just stay in bed and read one of Roald Dahl's short story collections for adults, The Umbrella Man. It's $7.99 on Amazon, so you won't even have to leave your building to get it.







This post was brought to you by Rihanna.

Breaking News!

It's been a long, cold February, but Mindy Kaling has finally updated her blog, Things I've Bought That I Love. If this blog has a mother, it's TIBTIL. Well, maybe a more accurate analogy is that this blog is like the child with a slutty single mom who doesn't want to tell us who the father is, and she's like, "Uh, your dad is Bob Barker" so we spend our whole lives plotting ways to get on The Price is Right so we can finally met our father, and finally he has to take out a restraining order and we end up in padded rooms mumbling about Showcase Showdown. (Note: this was a plotline on How I Met Your Mother, except that Barney ended up going on the show and making his "dad" very proud, and it was all very heartwarming.)

But anyway, Mindy Kaling's latest post, on lip gloss, was worth the wait. She's so right
about lipstick aging you, and I can't wait to go to the Carol's Daughter store in Fort Greene to get some lip gloss!

Also, can I say that I think it's criminal that Mindy Kaling isn't featured in Vanity Fair's Women in Comedy issue? I love Jenna Fischer to death, but Mindy Kaling is 50 times funnier! She writes and acts and does stand-up and writes a hilarious blog! Mindy Kaling is a comedy goddess, and she's left out in favor of Sandra Bernhardt? Whatever, Vanity Fair. I want Mindy Kaling to blog about this egregious oversight and then maybe Vanity Fair will make a Mindy Kaling in Comedy issue to right this wrong. Keep your fingers crossed.

In order to celebrate Mindy Kaling in our own small way, may I present...

Mindy Kaling's Top 10 Best Blog Entries:
11. Summer 2007 Cute Awards: "I almost want to say mean things about Justin Timberlake, his reign as Prime Minister of Cool has been too unsullied. I get that a guy can sing in perfect falsetto, hip-hop dance and play the piano at the same time. But he does it in a fucking three piece suit. I'm worried a little about Justin though. What if he gets assassinated? He's got to be the plummest target to al-Qaeda type terrorists. Certain people, like Jerry Seinfeld, Paul Simon, Oprah, JT...these are national treasures. Anyway, I hope he lives to be on the Summer Cute Awards 2008."

10. Adorable Guys Rock Purple: "My friend Vali is famously a total jerk no one likes, but he wears this one pink shirt and all of a sudden all is forgiven."

9. All About Grandmothers: "I have given my grandmother "Pride & Prejudice" in every conceivable form there is: book, unabridged book, audio tape, DVD starring Colin Firth, DVD starring Keira Knightley, novelization of the Keira Knightley movie. Well no, I didn't give her that. But I would if it existed."

8. Oh my god you guys (Golden Globes update): "People yell "Big smile Jennifer!" and it's like they're shouting nonsense words at this stony-faced Aztec princess. Her husband/handler Marc Anthony just looked so Rats of Nimh compared to her."

7. Strike!: "Remember radio comedies during the Depression? I don't, I'm not even sure the radio was invented then, but I'm pretty sure it was. And what would those sockless Depression-era Americans have done without the bathtub song stylings of Radio Joe or whatever? I'm like those guys. This country was founded on debt. We need debt to thrive and stuff (This is my cursory understanding of what debt is from my high school Econ class)."

6. The Conair Handheld Steamer: "I'm leaving for New York tomorrow and wasn't going to bring my favorite yellow silk BeBe dress (yeah, I shop at bebe sometimes. Me and a bunch of 14 year old girls, and young Persian moms!) but thanks to my little steamer, I can totally throw the dress in my carry-on, let it get all wrinkly and gross, then steam the shit out of it in New York, put on jeans, lip gloss, my tunic, some heels, and be at Da Silvano...in like 20 minutes. Drunk in 35! Yaaaayy!!!"

5. American Apparel Cotton Spandex Jersey Boy Brief: "Sunday Morning Fantasy #27 looks like this: Park Slope, Brooklyn. I am reading the Times Book Review and eating granola and fruit in these underwear and a tank top at my kitchen table with Pharell, my boyfriend. We argue whether George Saunders is funnier in fiction or non-fiction (I say fiction, by a factor of 10. Pharrell disagrees, he loves his journalism.). The arguing really begins to escalate until our good friend Ryan McGinley arrives and persuades us to go to BAM with him. Both Ryan and Pharrell agree that my underwear is adorable."

4. The Arcade Fire at the Hollywood Bowl: "How fucking cool am I for going to this concert? First of all, every single acquaintance, friend, co-worker, foe, or guy I've ever dated or had a crush on was at this concert. Gene, who was also there, aptly said "I have never seen so many white people in one place at one time". It would add that the audience could also have passed as the International Urban Outfitters Salespeople Convention."

3. Christian Louboutin: "f I am going to spend more than $500 on a pair of shoes, you better believe it's gonna be a fucking extension of my womanhood. And you guys, they are. They frickin are. With their signature fuck-me red insoles and whimsical styles, you can tell a Louboutin from the rest of the designer bunch."

2. Silver Lake: "See, now I feel myself growing scared. Will a mean/brilliant dude from Vice Magazine mock this? Is Echo Park actually "Williamsburg west"? Or Glendale? Oh god. Sometimes I'm more scared of mean verbose hipsters than I am of like, Muslim fundamentalists."

1. Things that I will buy that I will love: New York edition: "Now I feel incredibly guilty for having spent so much money. I better go work on my spec screenplay, the third installment of the "Ghostbusters" movies - with a girl-power update, starring Amy Poehler, Zooey Deschanel, Amber Tamblyn and myself - called "I Ain't Afraid A'No Ghost". I need to sit in a diner and write all afternoon. So I go to Veselka."

I basically just picked this list at random, since every single entry is good enough to be on a Best Of Mindy Kaling list. But if I missed one of your favorites, ("crazy magic god powder", anyone?) list it in the comments.

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How to store that paper you exchange for clothes and shoes

I got a new wallet yesterday, and I'm pretty excited about it.

For years I used one of those "magic" flip wallets from J.Crew. It's a very fun wallet, and before long I got really good at putting money in the middle, closing it, then reopening it to reveal the money transferred underneath the straps. Magic! It was also great because I didn't need to take my NYU ID out of the wallet to get into the academic buildings, I could just flash the inside of my wallet. And it's very small and compact, so I could even fit it into my back pocket if I so chose. But at the end of last summer, as I prepared to go study abroad in Prague, I knew it was time for something new.

See, the thing about the flip wallet is that it only fits things of a very specific size: nothing wider than a dollar bill. I knew that Czech money was bigger, and so was the money of many of the countries I planned to visit. Plus, while I was fine with never using change in America and just collecting it in a little jar on my desk, in Prague you can buy a beer with a 20 kc coin, so they're well worth carrying around. I went to Target, got a very practical navy blue wallet with tons of places for coins and id cards and tickets and whatnot, and very happily carried it around Europe.

But I never really fell in love with it, because it was too practical. Whenever I got compliments on it, I would suspiciously say, "Really? You don't think this is an old lady pocketbook? Because I sort of do." Plus, it's huge, so I can barely button the clutch I like to use when I go out. Ever since coming back to America I've been looking for a wallet that was somewhere in between the Children's Toy wallet and the Running a Household wallet.

Enter this little number. It has the slightly reserved navy blue exterior, but then shiny gold polka dots! And inside, it has a nice little coin pocket, but it's super bling-y solid gold! It's very soft fake leather, and I think it's going to fit great in my smaller purses.







Speaking of smaller purses, I've been on the lookout for a better going-out bag. The ideal bag is on the small side (big enough for your wallet, cell phone, keys, lip gloss and not much else), cute enough to make you happy just by looking at it, and, most importantly, has a shoulder strap. I love clutches, but I hate carrying them. And when I want to dance, I either have to leave the purse on the bar, hid it inside my coat, or hold it and dance that much more awkwardly. If I had a purse with a shoulder strap, I could just throw it around my neck and dance all I want, leaving both hands free for being spun around by some random dude.

I like this one from Urban Outfitters. Ignore the sullen, bitch-faced model-- what do you think of the bag? It's called the Coast to Coast Camera Bag, and it has that "I found it at a garage sale" look that some people like. It's box-like, so I'm worried that it would sort of hurt if I was dancing around and it banged against my hip. But wearing it would make me feel like an old-timey (but not too old-timey) photographer or journalist-- can't you see Joan Didion wearing this (not that she's old-timey, but still)?



Target doesn't have a photo of this on a model, but the "Cross-body bag" could fit what I'm looking for. It's really plain and simple and kind of cheap looking in that Target way, but it'll go with every outfit and I'll only use it in dark places, anyway.

If anyone has some good recommendations for going out bags, hit me up in the comments. I obviously need some guidance.




Deux Lux Polka-dot wallet, $9.99 from Urban Outfitters. It's sold out online, but maybe you can find it in stores.
J.Crew Leather Magic Wallet, $28
Coast to Coast Camera bag, $34, from Urban Outfitters
Xhilaration Cross-body bag, $9.99, from Target

Crimes Against Humanity

This morning I was walking to class and noticed that the girl in front of me was wearing (from top to bottom) a North Face fleece, a Longchamp bag, teal velour sweats, and Uggs. I wanted to tap her on the shoulder and then punch her in the face.



I believe in comfort, I really do. But if you're going to wear something like this, why even get out of bed? And the thing that killed me is that her hair was perfect; stick-straight, not a split end or flyaway in sight. She probably spent 30 minutes giving herself a blow out, and she couldn't take an extra two seconds to throw on jeans and ballet flats and look like a presentable human being. What if she had run into Chace Crawford on the street, or even worse, Tim Gunn? She would have rued the day she ever put on half of a teal sweatsuit.

Reading is Sexy

So there about a million reasons that I want to make John Mayer my husband. I found another one yesterday, when I read the interview he gave after winning the world's most prestigious award, Cosmo's Fun Fearless Male of the Year.

Cosmo: How do you know you're into a girl?
John Mayer: If I wake up in the morning and I don't want to get you a coffee or if I don't see you for a week and I don't want to go figure out something to FedEx you, then we've got a problem. You can fake the words I miss you, but you can't fake getting someone a book.

In my ideal, fantasy relationship, my boyfriend sends me (because he knows I love getting mail) a book he saw at Barnes and Noble (because he goes to B&N just to check out what's New and Recommended) and bought because he though I would like it (and it's not my birthday). Also, in my ideal, fantasy relationship John Mayer is my boyfriend.

I thought about posting about this in my personal blog, but then I saw something today that convinced me it would work in the shopping blog.

I had seen the "Reading is Sexy" t-shirt years ago when Rory wore it on Gilmore Girls, but a mug is so much better.


I'm a huge fan of mugs; I think they make perfect gifts for people you aren't extremely close to and souvenirs for yourself when you travel. Why is a mug better than a t-shirt or keychain? Because it's actually sort of practical, and you'll use it. I love drinking coffee (and by drinking coffee, I mean eating ice cream) out of my ArrDev mug or hand-painted Krakow, Poland mug because they remind me of how excited I was to first buy them. And really, who can be sad when drinking out of a Dundie Award Winner mug?

But back to the "Reading is Sexy" mug. Besides the fun slogan and bright color, it's also made of corn plastic so it's perfect for the environmentally conscious, slightly clumsy, English major in your life. Because honestly: reading is sexy. I'm not joking, when I see a boy on the bus reading Norman Mailer I want to ask him for his number on the spot. There were a lot of normal, logical reasons I broke up with the last guy I dated, but one of the huge ones that people might not understand is that I couldn't date a guy who didn't read. He could read (just barely, judging by the almost unreadable text messages he always sent), but he didn't because he was an idiot. And because he didn't read, he couldn't understand how important books are to me, and thus he couldn't understand me. He would see this "Reading is Sexy" mug and scoff, and I would have been like, "Yeah, please stop calling me at 2 in the morning when you know I'm sleeping."

Reading is Sexy mug by Sarah Utter, $12
Reading is Sexy t-shirt, $14.95
Dundie Award Winner mug by NBC, $14

EDITED TO ADD: I totally forgot that I had this photo that used to be the wallpaper on my computer and is now part of my screensaver slideshow:

Celebrites: Alien or Human?

Danielle and I often discuss how you have to love celebrities like Mariah Carey and Victoria Beckham because they are so deeply, totally committed to be as fabulous as possible that they're basically not human anymore. Mariah may take her dog for a walk, but she does it in 4 inch Manolos and a mini-dress. In January. And she probably has an assistant whose entire job it is to pick up the poop. You know I love actors like Jennifer Garner, who probably spends an average day coloring with Violet, taking her to the playground, and then making mac n' cheese for dinner. But it takes a whole other level of commitment to live like these women. A few months ago this photo of Victoria Beckham and Dita Von Teese was posted on Jezebel.com, and one of the comments was "They're like aliens from Planet Fabulous." Yes! That's what I demand from this kind of star-- I don't want them to do anything that might land them in the "Stars-- They're Just Like US!" pages, like pumping gas or going to the gym in sweats with no makeup. No passing out drunk in the front seat of cars or walking into bathroom's barefoot, either. In exchange for the public's attention and spending money, they should give us a full-on glamour persona 24/7.

But the thing about this is that when they break out of the persona, it's so suprising and refreshing that you end up liking them even more when they break out of the persona. Say, Mariah Carey showing she has a sense of humor about herself by playing laser tag with Kenneth from 30 Rock in her new music video. Or, specifically, this photo of Posh Spice shopping at Target that inspired this post. She's wearing jeans and a t-shirt, carrying her own basket, shopping for $5.99 DVD bargains or whatever, and she looks shockingly great. I mean, if you could sleep with Target Posh or bug-eyed sunglasses Posh, you would pick Target Posh, right?

On the other hand, she brought her security team with her to the store. Doesn't that seem kind of unnecessary? What mob is going to form at Target around Victoria Beckham?

So, I don't know what this does to my theory of celebrity. But I do know that all celebrities should aspire to be more like Naomi Campbell, who showed up to do community service wearing a dress that probably cost way more than a year's rent, and then auctioned the dress off to charity. Strut on, Naomi.

This one's for the boys

It should be obvious that the intended audience for this blog is males 18 to 25 years of age who like video games and drinking beer. The whole reason we started blogging is to help bring espadrilles and lockets to dudes all over America, and I think that, so far, it's all been an unqualified success. Every day when I'm walking down the street I get stopped by college guys who say, "Thank you for that post on wrap dresses. It saved my life." At this point I've heard it so often that I'm like, "Yeah, whatever, I know." But that doesn't mean I'm going to stop bringing pretty, dainty jewelry to our male readers, so don't despair!

Today's topic is coats and jackets. First off, don't just throw on a North Face fleece and think you're done. I don't care if they're warm and comfortable, because they are the laziest pieces of outerwear ever created. They're the Uggs of outerwear. You can do better than that.

Every guy needs a good peacoat, and it's even better if it's in navy blue or dark green instead of black. This one, from the Gap, is waxed cotton-- I like the winter-y style in the spring-y fabric. This is the jacket you should wear when the weather is in the 50's and you'd normally be wearing a hoodie but recently decided not to be a slub. Also, check out the lighter-blue striped shirt underneath, with the color poking out. That's good styling. The Waxed-Cotton peacoat is $88.

When I first started this post I looked at the Sartorialist for inspiration, to try and figure how men's fashion can ever be not boring. This is one of the first photos that caught my eye, and you should go see it full-size so you can check out the greenish-grey sweater poking out underneath, and the single pin on his chest.

That jacket is similar to the Military jacket, $88, also from the Gap. I think all guys will agree that it's good to have a jacket with lots of pockets so you never run out of places to put condoms. It only comes in "ginseng brown," though.

As I'm searching for more jackets, I'm having a hard time deciding whether I actually like that piece of clothing or I just think the model's cute. Like, how cute is this guy and how boring is his jacket? He looks like a model-y version of the guy in the T-Mobile commercial who keeps leaving messages for the girl he went on a date with last night, like "Hey, sorry I was sweating so much last night, it's a gland thing..." I love that guy! But I hope he would have more sense than to buy a $68 hoodie from Banana Republic in a color called "groundhog heather" (what a bunch of queerballs).

You guys, I've been working on this post all morning and I'm about to fall asleep from boredom. Men's fashion fucking blows. But I'm going to take some caffeine pills and keep going, all for Ariel.

This is a pretty nice coat, I guess. From Toscano, it's called the "Walking Coat," $298, so there's no running or jumping allowed. It's mostly wool (warm) with a hint of cashmere (soft).

I love jackets with toggles, even though I understand they can be kind of a pain to fasten and unfasten. But they have a very "tailgating at the big game" feel, which appeals to fun college girls. It's by Marc New York and it's $159 at Bluefly.

I can't say for sure, but I think I'd be really into a crisp white coat on a guy. It could be a little overly foppish, but it could also signal the kind of confidence that comes with high dry-cleaning bills. Especially if the coat was Burberry. This peacoat is $650, but once people catch a glimpse of the Burberry plaid under the collar, it'll be so worth it.

Men's jackets can be so boring, but then you find something with a really fun, surprising detail and everything is good again. The Manolo for the Men blog did a post on this Paul Smith jacket whose lining is a map of London. I couldn't find it anywhere online, but that's the sort of thing you should be on the look-out for if you want a distinctive coat.

I think that's enough men's fashion for today. I'll leave you off with some more coat inspiration, from the Sartorialist and elsewhere:

This kid is totally the douche in your film class who won't shut up about auteur theory and you hate but are secretly attracted to. You'll see him smoking outside of Cantor and hate his sunglasses and skinny jeans, but if he asked you to go see an unknown band in Williamsburg you would probably say yes.


Did you see on the Oscars Red Carpet when Ryan Seacrest told George Clooney, "People used to want to be Cary Grant, but now everyone wants to be you." And Clooney smoothly said, "Well, that's because he's dead and no one wants to be dead." WHY IS HE WASTING HIS LIFE WITH A WOMAN WHO ATE A SCORPION ON NATIONAL TELEVISION?

Because not ALL New Yorkers wear all black

New York Magazine just ran a feature on New Yorkers who wear the same color exclusively every day (other than black!). It's really fascinating; you can read it here. The corresponding photos are really impressive because each persons' style is distinctive and specific despite their being relegated to wearing only one color. I'm going to tap into my inner curator and post some color-saturated spring pieces, as well as the photographs that were my inspiration. While I can't see myself wearing head-to-toe of one of these colors, these New Yorkers prove that the monochromatic look can be pulled off brilliantly.

Pictures and quotes are from nymag.com.

BLUE

Valeria “ValBlu” McCulloch: "In college, I majored in color theory. Blue was the most interesting color, historically. Germanic tribes wore it to ward off enemies; Christians used it to denote divinity. Wearing blue for me is being in a dream all day."

Nanette Lepore "Mille Baci" Dress, $250
Unearthed Polished Stingray Silver Lined Cuff, $85
J. Crew Striped 120s Kensington Shirt, $68
Arden B. Dot Ruffle Neck Blouse, $68
Rebecca Taylor Chiffon Dress, $329
Hunter Boots Wellington Rain Boots, $98

GREEN

Elizabeth Sweetheart: "I’m from Nova Scotia, where green is in your surroundings. I missed nature when I moved to New York. I started wearing green nail polish, and it spread all over me."

Vintage Coat, $80
Kate Spade Orchard Street N/S Rae, $625
Artisan Impact Peridot and Pearl Ring, $300
Helene Berman Pocket Shift Dress, $178
TWILLTWENTYTWO "Grace" Double Breasted Twill Jacket, $242
J. Crew Featherweight Merino Ruffle Cardigan, $88

GRAY

Rebecca Turbow: "I like everything to be clean, and gray is clean. Gray is between black and white, so it’s a noncolor, almost. I feel messy and unclean if I wear other colors."

Large Windswept Trees Cuff in Silver, $180
Lovesome Peep-Toes, $328
J. Crew Cashmere Tee, $118
Foley + Corinna Metallic Mini City Tote, $384
Flowered Sky Shift, $158
VPL Andro Unitard, $795

WHITE/PINK

Karim Rashid: "In college, I was obsessed with wearing all white. I felt angelic and free.... My mother dressed me in pink when I was a child. She wanted me to be a girl."

Sublet Amirah Dress, $143
Paperwhites Dress, $228
Star of the East Shell and Pearl Rose Earrings, $37
Tretorn Plask W Rubber Boots, $130
bebe Short Sleeve Coat, $98
Arden B. Jacquard Sweetheart Tube, $78

BROWN

Stephin Merritt: "The great thing about brown is when it fades, you can’t tell what color it originally was. There’s no sense of the 'right' color saturation."

Sharon Gill Maui Brown Tunic, $169
Vintage Alligator Doctor Bag, $895
Marc by Marc Jacobs Silk Cotton Faille Short, $198
Via Spiga Zebra Print Trench Coat, $168
Marc by Marc Jacobs Studded Round Face Watch, $250
Cha Cha Sweet Jane Bag, $295

The JF essentials

Everyone has those few things in their wardrobe that they wear way, way too often and would be devastated if they ever lost. Here' s mine.

I've only had my tall leather boots for two months, but they're already the light of my life. I wear them constantly, to work and school and parties and shopping and errand running-- the only things they're bad for are working out (obviously) and shoe shopping, because it's a hassle to put them off and on again each time you want to try on a slingback.

But any other time, they're great. And also sort of magical, because they can make any outfit look either more casual or more fancy. Want to wear a fairly nice dress to dinner but don't want to seem like you're trying too hard? These boots make it seem like you just threw it all together without a second thought. Want to wear jeans but don't want people to think you're a slobby college student? Tuck those jeans into the boots and you're instantly a girl of taste and style. Also, they keep your feet and legs nice and warm in the winter, but I don't think they'll get too hot during the summer if you wear them with bare legs. I'm looking forward to wearing these boots four times a week for the rest of my life. They're from J.Crew but are unfortunately all sold out, and since it's spring J.Crew isn't selling any new leather boots. But look around and find your own pair of boots to love; they're expensive but so worth it.

The next item is very cheap, I promise. The essential featherweight cami from GapBody, $14.50 or $10 each for 2 or more, is hands-down the best camisole I've ever owned, and I've had a lot of tank and camis in my life. I bought the grey one at the end of the summer, and since then I'd say I've worn it over a hundred times. I wear it under cardigans or sweaters, under low-cut dresses, under thin t-shirts, to sleep in, by itself to hang around the house in-- it's been 6 months and I'm still in that stage where I never want to take it off. I'm wearing it right now! I bought the black one as soon as I got back from Prague, and I'm tempted to get the white one, along with extra black and grey ones. I'm also praying that come spring GapBody will make them in fun colors like navy or light blue, maybe some pink. I'll be honest and say that the grey one does seem a little stretched out, and the fabric isn't as soft as it used to be. But I've gone days without taking it off except to shower, and it underwent the abusive measures of Czech washing machines, so I think it's excusable.

So why do I love this cami so much? It's soft but not overly thin, so it feels great against my skin but I can also wear it out of the house. It's also a really great length, a little bit longer, so it never rides up and gets scrunched around your waist. The gray is an incredibly versatile shade, and there's not really any color I can't match it to. Also, I'm usually really into v-necks but the slightly-scooped neckline makes it a little more modest, but it comes down low enough that you don't feel like a Puritan. It really is the best cami on earth, and it's $10! But word of warning: don't get distracted and go into regular Gap and buy their camis. Despite the bright, fun colors they have, the shape is not even close to as good as the GapBody one. Trust me.

My next essential is my flattened pearl necklace form Anthropologie. I firmly believe in having a signature necklace, because most of the time I'm too lazy to take it off and pick a new one, and also it's a lot harder to lose something that's constantly around your neck. I'd say that I wear this necklace about 80% of the time. It doesn't really match any earrings that I own, so I have to take it off when I want to class it up with other jewelry, but for day-to-day wear it's perfect. Not too flashy, but I get compliments all the time. You can sort of see it on me in this photo (I'm the farthest from the camera, and too lazy to crop the other two lovely ladies out. Also, doesn't it look like this might be a still from a movie if I didn't have such a dumbass half-smile on my face?).

I deeply believe in wearing a watch-- I have a heard time taking anyone seriously who doesn't. And while I wish I wore a dainty, silver, fancy and cute watch, one with roman numerals and whatnot, I just don't roll that way. First, I like all my jewelry to be waterproof because I never remember to take it off when I shower (and also, when you're washing your hair, don't you want to check what time it is?), and also because if someone wants to throw me in the pool I'll be able to kick and scream girlishly instead of having to screech terrifyingly "Do NOT ruin my $3,000 Tiffany watch!" But more importantly, I've worn a digital watch for so long that I'm really, really bad at reading analog faces. When I took Italian freshman year, part of our oral final was to look at clock faces and tell the teacher what time it was. I did awfully, not because I didn't know the vocab but because I kept reading the clocks wrong.

So I need a sporty, hardy digital watch. I'm a fan of Timex because while they're not the cutest in the world, they have all the tools (stop watch, alarm, timer, light) I want without being really bulky. I have the Ironman Triatholon watch, $60. Probably my favorite thing about this watch is how it tells you the day and date; I have no memory for that sort of detail, so every time I have to date a piece of paper I look at my watch.

It seems that every time I buy and start using a new day-to-day purse, I go bigger (not counting when I switched from a backpack to a purse back in high school). About a year ago I was using a fairly cute tote bag from Old Navy to carry my books, but it had a small hole in the bottom that I knew wouldn't get any smaller. So, one day when wandering around the West Village, I decided to gather all my courage and go into the Marc by Marc Jacobs store. The bravery wasn't needed, since that place is like an accessories candy store-- all these cute plastic things for $7 with "marc by marc jacobs" plastered on top. And then I saw this canvas tote bag, for $12. It's the perfect size-- I could fit my Complete Shakespeare, plus an American Lit anthology, plus a notebook, plus a wallet. It also has a nice long strap that stays on your shoulder, and extremely sturdy construction. Plus, you get the name with a sense of humor. Style.com describes it as "stylish yet unobtrusive, and demonstrates a sly sense of humor about the myriad diffusion lines that designers are busily spinning off." I loved it for months-- until I started seeing all these other people wearing it. And not just trendy girls, but annoying boys too! I took some comfort in the fact that, since I had washed it, the color was fairly faded and you could tell I had my for a long time and wasn't one of those girls who jump on a designer name-driven trend as soon as everyone else did. But then, in November, I took this bag with me to Krakow and my passport fell out somehow, and I had to spend an extra two days visiting the American Embassy in Poland and then Auschwitz (to retrieve the lost passport). At that point I knew it was time for a new bag, so I went into the Polish equivalent of Forever 21 and got a big, brown leather purse with a little zipped pocket inside the perfect size for my passport. It kind of looks like this $400 J.Crew purse, except mine is brown and cost like 80 zlotys, which is the fake Polish money. I still use the marc jacobs tote for when I go to the gym, and it's also good for buy groceries since it holds about 10 square yards worth of stuff. You can only buy it in stores, I believe, but you shouldn't because then I'll get annoyed at how everyone is biting my style and I need to wait until the next big thing comes along before I can wear it again.

What items are your essentials?

Anchors Away!, Part 2

As you know, Julia has described her fashion philosophy as thus: "Always be dressed as if you might step onto a yacht at a moment's notice." During the summer, I like to adopt a similar fashion philosophy: "Always be dressed as if you might step onto Sean Combs' yacht at a moment's notice. Also, you're J.Lo." (By the way, Julia and I think that she and P. Diddy should get back together. Anyone else agree?)

First of all, you're gonna need a few bikinis. I'm usually not so into J. Crew, but I have to say that I dig their brightly-colored swim separates. They'll perfectly compliment a tan and they add the right panache to basic, potentially boring styles. This summer, I'm definitely going to be rocking a bandeau top. As my fellow small-chested girls know, one of the few advantages to having tiny boobs is never having to worry about wearing a bra. It's a right we exercise proudly and often, it being the only comeuppance we have against our better-endowed friends. I also like the bohemian touch the gold rings add to the otherwise basic bottom. And it would make some interesting tan lines. (Bandeau top, $40, and gold-ring bikini bottoms, $42, available at JCrew.com with a million other styles.)

Now, you need a cover-up

that's sexy and fun. I love the carefree, exotic vibe of these kimonos and caftans by Lotty B. Hand painted onto silk by a designer from the Caribbean, these cover-ups are as luxurious as they come. So what if they're not practical? You're a movie star. Practicality means nothing to you. (Kimono, $245, and short kaftan, $175, available at LottyB.com.)

On the subject of practicality: one would argue, perhaps, that it is unpractical to wear jewelry at the beach. That's correct. But on a yacht? Totally acceptable. On P. Diddy's yacht? Absolutely necessary. So here are two viable options for earrings. (I should really do a post devoted to jewelry sometime; I'm always finding such beautiful things.) On the right, we have Telee Couture's Peacock Pearl Drop earrings, $19. I bought these recently but haven't been able to wear them yet because I just got my ears pierced. But, oh man, I can't wait. They're so fierce. Pictured on the left are Viv and Ingrid's Gold and Onyx Grecian 5-Drop earrings, $125. These remind me of something Elizabeth Taylor would wear in Cleopatra. Actually, the chains would probably get tangled up in that beaded headpiece she wore, so never mind. They're still gorg, though.

As for footwear, I bought a pair of K. Jacques sandals a few years ago that I wear constantly in the summer. Bernardo makes good ones, too. But just in case you are someone who frequents Diddy's yacht, or if you are in fact J. Lo, consider these beauties by Goldenbleu's brand-new shoe line:

These are not your mother's espadrilles. These are not the espadrilles Audrey Hepburn stomped around in in Roman Holiday or Grace Kelly wore in To Catch a Thief. No, these espadrilles were made for lounging poolside, for sporting at rooftop parties in the city, and for wearing aboard yachts.

(Price: unknown. Which is probably for the best. It would just depress us.)